humor Quotes

"I have just got a new theory of eternity."

"I love to travel, but hate to arrive."

"The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life. Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat."

"I used to go away for weeks in a state of confusion."

"You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I've only ever had one."

"Science is a wonderful thing if one does not have to earn one's living at it."

"The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once."

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

"The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead."

"The hardest thing to understand in the world is the income tax."